What we're up to...

As the days begin to stay light longer and we see temperatures rising above zero occasionally, we're encouraged that winter may eventually come to an end. Emilie has been talking for weeks about how she is looking forward to just "walking out the door" in her bare feet with a summer dress on. And I remind myself when I step on wet carpet in a perpetually soggy entrance with an array of winter outerwear drying everywhere, that after winter comes dead grass tramped all over the house - so indeed, getting your socks wet from melting snow provides something for which to be grateful.

 All in all, we are enjoying the many outdoor adventures of a wonderful winter: snow shoeing, skiing, sledding, skating, and shelter building. Joseph and John Paul built an amazing little shelter at Grandpa and Grandma Millette's acreage with just a few nails and pieces of wire besides the supplies they found in nature. They are all ready for an outdoor survival scenario and plan to send in their applications for the tv show Alone.

On one especially glorious winter day while dog sitting at the acreage, we took the kids across the field on skis and sleds for a little outdoor hot chocolate by the woods. 

Around our yard have been many and varied snow forts, little sledding hills, and coloured milk carton ice-block inukshuks. Making little outdoor kitchens and cooking as been a major winter pastime. 

On our colder days, we have been busy indoors with endless board games, wood-working, reading, and imaginative games. 

About the kids...

Emilie's favourite pastimes include dressing up in fancy dresses, giving tea parties, and making people elaborate pretend meals. She was overheard recently telling John Paul: "3 plus 4 take away 1 is the same as 3 plus 3, and that equals 6." On another occasion, overhearing Joseph tell Mommy that he thought "we" must be a noun in the sentence, Emilie was quick to shout, "It's a pronoun!" Indeed, she is smarter than we thought. Emilie has decided that "preschool" is a completely inadequate title for her current "four and three-quarters" age; she insists upon filling out a white board's worth of letters daily during school time to show Daddy, as well as filing through alphabet cards saying sounds and/or painting. Emilie has an eye for details and can frequently be found meticulously drawing very precise designs or organizing her clothes boxes. Speaking of details, Emilie is a master at memory games - especially the ones she has studied to the point of "rememorizing" so she can beat everyone at the game. 

Meanwhile, Jude continues to keep everyone on their toes. He climbs everything and anything; his protesting screams when he is removed from such heights are, I'm sure, easily heard by our neighbours. When he manages to get into the "off limits" bathroom, he can sometimes be found sitting on the potty, fully clothed, saying, "Go pee!" His vocabulary has expanded to include everyone's names, commands such as "Get out!" and "Breakfast!" and "Basement!" and endearing lines like "I wuv you!" and "NO!" Recently, he was found standing on a kitchen chair drying dishes and has since been dubbed Danny II as he shows signs of surpassing his "in-famous" father's 4-year-old feats (backstory: Dan frequently reminds us that at 4-years-old he was doing dishes, attending school, and playing hockey - Can anyone really live up to such young talent?).

 

When firing on all cylinders, John Paul boasts of finishing school by 9:30-10am every morning (he does, however, usually begin by 8am, give or take 15 mins). After Christmas, John Paul began taking piano lessons, proudly walking the 1/2 block to our piano teacher's home every Thursday afternoon with Joseph. He has quickly learned all his "Twinkles" as well as various other ditties and boasts performances at two recitals, including playing "Mary had a Little Lamb" and "Hot Cross Buns" all on black keys. Speaking of firing on cylinders, we have discovered that John Paul's optimum firing occurs directly after feeding time (i.e. supper) when he can be found tearing around the house at top speed and high volumes and is speedily exiled to the basement for the rest of his firing - this may or may not include guns.

John Paul's happy dictation

Our resident inventor and scientist, Joseph is often found in the basement carving, building, or repurposing wood, cardboard, and whatever other items he can find around, pick up at Grandpa's, or salvage from the garbage. Joseph frequently sets up science experiments for everyone to enjoy and/or chats about what a cool invention some new idea would make. When not inventing, Joseph is curled up somewhere with a book and, inevitably, in another world or era. His favourite reads these days include a plethora of Canadian historical history novels. The downfall to Joseph's many and varied interests resides in his short-term dedication to an idea; he will often decide to do something, begin immediately without thinking it through, and later drop everything when he realizes the shortcomings of his thought process or planning. Joseph continues to be a great help around the house, often rescuing his littlest brother from the crazy shenanigans he gets himself into.

Some Kid Quotes

Oh kids. We learn so much from them. And they learn so much from each other. Here are some of our latest Kid Quotes.


John Paul: "Emilie can say 'snot'!"

Joseph: "Yeah, I taught her how!"

Emilie, putting her finger in her nose: "nahh" (snot)

 - - -

Dad, after cleaning up colouring supplies and such: "Why do we have to have so many kids!

Joseph: "Yeah, but creative kids!"

 - - -

John Paul, colouring: "That's John Paul, and me, and sky, and grass..."

Mom: "John Paul and who?"

John Paul: "John Paul and me."

Mom: "But you ARE John Paul!"

John Paul: *shrugs*

 - - -

John Paul, getting dressed: "God wears the same thing everyday."

 - - -

Emilie, looking at Hattie the Hen in Hattie and Fox:

*Points to the eye* - "Eye!"

*Points to the the mouth* - "Mow" (mouth)

*Points to the comb* - "Too" (toque!)

 - - -

John Paul: "For my birthday I want a gun that you put on the ground and kick it and it shoots!"

 - - -

Joseph: "Dad, how do you spell whale?"

Dad: "W-H-A-L-E... wait, unless you mean the crying 'wail'..."

Joseph: "... No, it's a happy whale."

Catholic Culture Renovation: Palm Sunday and other Tidbits

A blessed Palm Sunday to you, if you are indeed reading this on Palm Sunday. Otherwise, a most blessed and suffering Holy Week to you.

We had our Palm Sunday Mass last night, and let me tell you we pulled out all the stops for it! Not organ stops (we'll get to those later). All the stops to get Emilie to behave. I was scheduled to narrate the Gospel, which meant Becca and the boys had to contend with the little "doll". Holy cards, objects, toys, treats... they lasted her all the way through to the homily! Later on I had the joy of chasing her around the church. That little girl can run when she wants to!

Speaking of the Gospel. As I read: "Jesus gave a loud cry and breathed his last," and then we all knelt down, John Paul turned to his mother: "Do we wave our palms NOW?"

Well we got through Mass. I stayed up late working with the palms. And we're stuck in Tisdale today. There's another snowstorm, of course. Following this storm will be a couple of weeks of cold temperatures. Highs of 13 below. Lows of 20 below. Not counting wind chill. We're skipping Spring this year, apparently. The Easter bunny will freeze his ears off.

Back to organ stops. Sort of. Before Mass our priest asked me if we should sing All Glory Laud and Honor, or The King of Glory Comes. I tried not to choke as I replied that All Glory Laud and Honor would be just fine. Here is a fine organ version of it.

There is a reason why the Church speaks so highly of the organ. Not the guitar. Nor piano. Nor even the theologically rich Trinitarian triangle. And this hymn, written by the great St. Theodulf, was created specifically for the great procession of Our Lord into Jerusalem. Fr. George Rutler, in his book The Stories of Hymns, explains that for St. Theodulf, a great defender of the faith was imprisoned for various false reasons: "it was the loveliness of 'Gloria, laus, et honor' that won Theodulf release after he was imprisoned on charges of treason against King Louis the Pious" (p. 59).

One final liturgical note as we enter Holy Week (ours has a birthday for a four year old in it!). The Collect from the Extraordinary Form on Friday was rather to the point.

"Mercifully pour forth, we beseech Thee, O Lord, Thy grace into our hearts; that we who restrain ourselves from sin by voluntary chastisement may suffer for a time rather than be condemned to eternal punishment. Through Our Lord."

Amen to that.

One final note. The boys have been keeping fit with me. I cannot wait until they get even older. I'll have spotters for my weight workouts! A blessed (with some suffering) Holy Week to you indeed. Remember, no pain, no gain(s).

Points to Ponder: I Don't Wanna Work

Here is an edition of Points to Ponder, because I don't want to work right now.

1) Heresy Sunday

Yesterday was Heresy, er, Trinity Sunday. Did you hear any heretical Trinitarian analogies? To be fair, it's quite easy to fall into heresy when trying to explain the Trinity. In our parish mailbox for kids Joseph received a colouring page with God having three hats, because God is not three distinct Persons you know, He just wears three different hats. *cough* Some other favourite heretical explanations of mine are God being the three forms of water, and the Trinity is like an egg. Thankfully we were at the Latin Mass yesterday and had some very solid preaching from Father Andrew. He noted the traditional prayers in the Mass and how they speak of the Trinity. He then explained that in the old rite a priest who says the Mass and breviary everyday does 50 signs of the crosses. He riled against how the crosses, which are important signs for us to remember and acknowledge the Blessed Trinity, have been removed. It was a very well done homily.

When in doubt, stick with this.

- - -

UPDATE

Or this?

- - -

2) Parading Around

I had to do a little prep work before we went to Saskatoon for Mass. Like a good dad I checked ahead of time to see if there were any, ahem, parades scheduled at that time, and if so what street. We wouldn't want to get caught up in such a parade. So I went online and searched. What soon came up was a story about controversy between the gay pride parade, and something called the Treaty 6 Real Pride march. Long story short, the real priders are upset that the new mayor of Saskatoon will marshal the other parade. One of the organizers is quoted as saying: "I love it that he's always been a supporter but as a white, straight male and a politician I don't think he should be the grand marshal of the parade."

So what's this? White straight males don't have rights anymore? What if they said a black female shouldn't marshal? So inconsistent! We must protest these parades! Don't attend!


3) Allow Jesus in Your Marriage

Becca was killing herself laughing over something. I went to go check what it was. Someone posted some engagement photos on facebook. Here they are:

I personally thought it was a nice touch inviting Jesus to their engagement photo shoot. We should photo shop Him into our wedding photos.


4) Fr. Kenny

It was three years ago today that I woke up and was shocked by the news that Fr. Kenneth Walker was murdered. May his soul, and all the souls of the faithful departed, rest in peace.

I've previously written about him here and here.

5) Stanley Cup

Yes, Sydney Crosby is still the best hockey player on the planet. Congratulations to him and the Pittsburgh Penguins.

But don't forget Phil Kessel! The chunky winger has now won back to back cups. Take that Leaf fans! I still remember fondly last year when he was first pictured with his beloved prize:

6) Joseph Quotes

The other day we were eating supper and talking about cheese. I'm guessing because we were eating cheese.

Mommy: "Did you know that Swiss cheese is holy Joseph?

Joseph: "Really?"

Daddy: "I read somewhere that Swiss cheese now is not holy anymore."

Mommy: "Really? I wonder why?"

Joseph, after pondering seriously for a moment: "Hmm... maybe because the Devil eats it..."


Think about that.


7) The End is Nigh

I am so close to being done school. This year more than any other I simply can't wait to be done. I need a break! I teach two students in particular who cause a great amount of trouble. What's worse is how their parents believe everything they say, even when there are five teachers and an army of evidence contradicting the child. It's sad but true when I tell people that there are student I teach whom I know will someday end up in jail. And yet, one such boy today told me that he wanted to be a teacher when he grows up! I think I mumbled the curse to him: "I hope you have a student who treats you the way you treat me..."

But the end is nigh. Twelve more teaching days!

Kid Quotes: Potty Mouths

A few recent quotes

While saying our night prayers. Daddy: "And what do you want to thank God for, John Paul?"

John Paul: "Thank you God for my pooping and peeing in the potty."

- - -

John Paul: "Now I can get my gitch!" *huge smile*

Picks out new gitch and has it put on him...

John Paul: *cries* "I don't want to wear my new gitch!" *more tears*

- - -

John Paul: "I pee with the bum because I sit down on the potty."

- - -

John Paul: "When is summer?"

Becca: "Not for a long time; after your birthday and Easter..."

John Paul: "Yeah, and after I go on the potty."

Becca: "Yep."

John Paul: "That's going to be fun!"

Becca: "Summer?"

John Paul: "No, potty training!"

- - -

John Paul: "Mom, don't for-you-get to do up the button!"

- - -

Joseph: "I have to go pee. Come on John Paul. You have to go pee too."

They both run to the bathroom.

- - -

Becca, after week one of potty training, sincerely: "I'm so proud of John Paul, the way he just poops and pees."

Other things...

John Paul: Look mom, you have girl hair. That's why you're a girl."

- - -

John Paul: "Joseph, how about you be St. Pope the Baptist and I'll be the pope."

- - -

Daddy walks into the room, dressed for work.

John Paul, still in his pajamas: "Daddy, you're smaaaaart!"

Daddy: "You're smart too."

John Paul: "No, no, people who wear onesies are not smart!"

- - -

John Paul, looking out the window at the snow: "When's summer!?!"

- - -

Daddy breaks a bowl (we're very short of bowls)

Joseph: We can't have two more kids... we don't have enough bowls!"

John Paul: Maybe we should go to the bowl store?"

- - -


The boys love watching Mass on ETWN. They especially love to check to see if the "altar grandpa" is serving Mass that day.

While at our own Mass the other day, an older woman went up to serve at Mass.

John Paul loudly: "Look, it's an altar grandma!!!"

Saying Mass

Eating Food

Problems at Home/School

An apparently typical scene at our house, er, school. We have some serious issues here.

Here's the five year old Joseph teaching the 2 year old John Paul.


Joseph: "I'm going to teach you how to count to 100 by 10s: 10. 20. 30. 50. 60.."

John Paul: "No! 40!"

- - -

Joseph's not supposed to know how to count by 10s yet. That's next year. Follow the curriculum already!

John Paul? What are we going to do with him. Interrupting others. Tsk Tsk Tsk. Where's the self-regulation? Where's the empathy towards Joseph? Joseph needs empowering, not bullying.

Big issues. indeed.

The Theology of Purgatory, As Seen by Little Kids

Our boys are currently playing with cars. The cars are all taking trips to the graveyard. November is the month to pray for the souls in purgatory. We've prayed for them at Masses, and taken some trips to the graveyard. To add to this, a lady who used to work the snack counter at the Co-op just passed away this week. The boys have been trying to process death, and how we as Catholics pray for the souls in purgatory, and have hope for heaven by Jesus' victory over death.


John Paul, on hearing the snack lady died: "We must go pray for her body!"

Joseph: "No! Her soul!"

- - -

Joseph, after explaining to him that the snack lady died: "Hmmm, I guess we'll have to go to the bakery counter and get cookies instead now."

Later, Joseph, as we left for the cemetery: "We have to go to the graveyard for her funeral."

- - -

Driving by the hospital, John Paul: "Jesus died in the hospital!"

- - -

John Paul at the cemetery: "Mommy stepped on a grave! I stepped on... um.. a leaf!"

- - - 

John Paul explaining how Jesus died: "Jesus was afraid of the animals and he died!"

- - -

After trying to explain that smaller boxes Joseph saw were of people's ashes, Joseph: "Two people died in those boxes."

- - -

John Paul on Jesus' current state: "Jesus is dying in heaven right now."

Daddy: "No he's not."

John Paul: "Um, Jesus is dying on the cross."

Joseph: "No! He's alive."

John Paul: "Um, Jesus is alive."

- - -

Uh oh, Joseph is now upset at John Paul because John Paul's car parked on a grave.

Kid Quotes: Small Talk

When you have a chatty two year old with a mind of his own it's important to have a pen and paper handy. Here are more Kid Quotes:


John Paul, picking up a long piece of red hair off the ground: "Here Mommy, this is your hair... Put it on your head."

- - -

John Paul: "I have to buy some money!"

- - -

John Paul, taking out some paper and crayons: "I'm making a card for me cause I need one."

- - -

Daddy is in the basement working out with the boys, when a certain odour arises: "John Paul, go upstairs and ask Mommy to change your diaper."

*John Paul leaves reluctantly*

John Paul upstairs: "Mommy... can you say no?"

Mommy: "Um... no...  ?"

John Paul goes downstairs to Daddy: "Mommy said no, so I will stay down stairs."

- - -

John Paul, squatting: "I have no lap either Mommy!"

Mommy: "I have a lap again because Emilie is born."

John Paul: "Well I will have to buy a lap."

- - -

Daddy, after Communion: "Who do you want to pray for?"

John Paul: "Mommy's baptism."

Daddy: "You can't pray for Mommy's baptism. Who do you want to pray for?"

John Paul: "Um, Emilie's baptism."

So we said a Hail Mary for Emilie's baptism, which was over two months earlier.

- - -

John Paul hands Mommy his shoe to put on for him and says in a funny voice:

"Thank you....     ... My shoe is saying thank you to my hand for holding it."

- - -

It's not all John Paul, though:

Joseph, wondering aloud: "Do you think Emilie is going to talk English or French when she gets older?"

Our little goofers.

Kid Quotes

I forgot I had these on record. Just a snippet from our boys (who never stop talking)...

Joseph: "I can't wait until Emilie is bigger. Then we can play house. I'll be the Daddy. She can be the Mommy. And John Paul can be the baby... Or Mommy can have another baby and then John Paul can be the big brother!"

- - -

John Paul after Mommy picks him a bean in the garden: "Hey!!! I want to pick a bean. Put back on so I can pick it."

- - -

John Paul, opening the back of his pants: "My bums are hot!"

- - - 

Mommy: "Say 'Arrr."

John Paul: "Nooo. I  can't say it because I'm too little. Joseph can say it because he's big."

A nice reasoned sentence to explain why he can't say R yet.

- - -

Mommy, reading the famous opening line from a Curious George book: "George was a good little monkey and always very..."

John Paul: "hungry!"

- - -

Mommy: "Do you have any kisses for me?"

John Paul: "Um... I have dem in my pocket."

- - - 

John Paul: "Sometimes... I love babies!"

And another time: "You're my best friend, Emilie!"

- - -

Joseph: "Is your water bottle full John Paul?

John Paul: It don't have some lots in it!"

- - -

John Paul randomly picks up a broken lego man, shows me, and says: "God will fix this guy."

Kids Say the Darndest Things

Kids say the darndest things. I wish we'd remember to write down all the things they say. The following is just based on my poor memory.

The other day as we were driving to Mass and Joseph complained that we always take the same road to get there. "Why can't we go to the church on a different road?!" I told him we could on the way home, but he would have to remind me or otherwise I'd forget. So Mass went along nicely. The boys were behaving well. I was impressed with their reverence and attention. After Communion Joseph and I knelt down together to say our traditional prayers together. We offer our intentions. Thank Jesus. Pray a Hail Mary and a St. Joseph pray for us. Joseph begins, ever so devoutly: "Hail Mary full of grace the Lord is with you, blessed... Dad! You have to remember to take a different road home! blessed are you..."

This morning Joseph woke up bouncing off the wall. He came running up to me with his now familiar: "Guess what!!!? I had the bestest dream ever!!!" What this time? "I dreamed I was putting stickers on Grandpa Millette's rink!!"

John Paul, when it's quiet at Mass, started singing loudly the song he and Joseph made: "Big fat jolly good baby!!" Who's kid is this?

Joseph and I were working out together in the basement. He looked up at my jersey hanging on the wall and asked why I didn't wear it. I said I liked to look at it on the wall when I worked out. He then repeated to me that a real Roughrider wore the jersey. I said "yep, he wore it last year in a real game. But then I bought it for 50 bucks." Joseph just nodded his head and replied: "Yeah, the Riders sold it because they needed 50 bucks. They were happy with that. They needed the 50 bucks so they sold it to you."

- - -

There are so many aspects of parenting that are beyond funny, but are completely inappropriate to share with the public. Well I'm going to break a couple of rules here and share just a couple of snippets. And they're tamer examples of life with little kids.

Caution: It's still rated R

John Paul has not mastered the English language yet. For instance, he cannot pronounce the 'k' sound. It comes off as a 't'. If he tried to say 'cat' it would sound like 'tat'. If he were to try and say 'kitty' it would sound like... you get the idea? Oh he loves to say 'kitty'. "Mom! you'se name our baby #itty!" Or, "Mom, see the big #itty!" Or, "I want #itty!" Oh yeah John Paul. Let's hope he learns to say his 'k' soon.

John Paul, though a devout lover of the Traditional Latin Mass, still has a soft spot for the sign of peace at the Novus Ordo Mass. He extends his hands and out to everyone and says, instead of peace: "Piss. Piss. Piss."

Anatomy is always fun. Of course John Paul is adamant he doesn't have a cute little bum but a "big bum!" It turns out he's confused about which side of the body the bum is on, the front or back. Becca: "Do you have a big bum?" John Paul: "@$$!!!" (yes!). Becca: "Where is your big bum?" John Paul points to the, er, front of his body: "Here big bum!" Points to his actual bum: "Here cute little bum!... Joseph have big bum and cute little bum too!"

Joseph was walking heading out the door one day so I asked him what he was doing. He replied with an obvious voice: "I'm going outside to pee."

Then he said to me a couple of days ago: "Dad, do you want to go pee outside too?"

And then John Paul yesterday, apparently takes note of Joseph at his pee "spot" outside, says to me: "Joseph pee wif finger! YEAH!"

Oh those boys.

 Joseph before Mass. He insisted on a tie.

John Paul crashes the picture session.

And then Joseph jumps on me and shouts: "Selfies!" And here they are.