Kids say the darndest things. I wish we'd remember to write down all the things they say. The following is just based on my poor memory.

The other day as we were driving to Mass and Joseph complained that we always take the same road to get there. "Why can't we go to the church on a different road?!" I told him we could on the way home, but he would have to remind me or otherwise I'd forget. So Mass went along nicely. The boys were behaving well. I was impressed with their reverence and attention. After Communion Joseph and I knelt down together to say our traditional prayers together. We offer our intentions. Thank Jesus. Pray a Hail Mary and a St. Joseph pray for us. Joseph begins, ever so devoutly: "Hail Mary full of grace the Lord is with you, blessed... Dad! You have to remember to take a different road home! blessed are you..."

This morning Joseph woke up bouncing off the wall. He came running up to me with his now familiar: "Guess what!!!? I had the bestest dream ever!!!" What this time? "I dreamed I was putting stickers on Grandpa Millette's rink!!"

John Paul, when it's quiet at Mass, started singing loudly the song he and Joseph made: "Big fat jolly good baby!!" Who's kid is this?

Joseph and I were working out together in the basement. He looked up at my jersey hanging on the wall and asked why I didn't wear it. I said I liked to look at it on the wall when I worked out. He then repeated to me that a real Roughrider wore the jersey. I said "yep, he wore it last year in a real game. But then I bought it for 50 bucks." Joseph just nodded his head and replied: "Yeah, the Riders sold it because they needed 50 bucks. They were happy with that. They needed the 50 bucks so they sold it to you."

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There are so many aspects of parenting that are beyond funny, but are completely inappropriate to share with the public. Well I'm going to break a couple of rules here and share just a couple of snippets. And they're tamer examples of life with little kids.

Caution: It's still rated R

John Paul has not mastered the English language yet. For instance, he cannot pronounce the 'k' sound. It comes off as a 't'. If he tried to say 'cat' it would sound like 'tat'. If he were to try and say 'kitty' it would sound like... you get the idea? Oh he loves to say 'kitty'. "Mom! you'se name our baby #itty!" Or, "Mom, see the big #itty!" Or, "I want #itty!" Oh yeah John Paul. Let's hope he learns to say his 'k' soon.

John Paul, though a devout lover of the Traditional Latin Mass, still has a soft spot for the sign of peace at the Novus Ordo Mass. He extends his hands and out to everyone and says, instead of peace: "Piss. Piss. Piss."

Anatomy is always fun. Of course John Paul is adamant he doesn't have a cute little bum but a "big bum!" It turns out he's confused about which side of the body the bum is on, the front or back. Becca: "Do you have a big bum?" John Paul: "@$$!!!" (yes!). Becca: "Where is your big bum?" John Paul points to the, er, front of his body: "Here big bum!" Points to his actual bum: "Here cute little bum!... Joseph have big bum and cute little bum too!"

Joseph was walking heading out the door one day so I asked him what he was doing. He replied with an obvious voice: "I'm going outside to pee."

Then he said to me a couple of days ago: "Dad, do you want to go pee outside too?"

And then John Paul yesterday, apparently takes note of Joseph at his pee "spot" outside, says to me: "Joseph pee wif finger! YEAH!"

Oh those boys.

 Joseph before Mass. He insisted on a tie.

John Paul crashes the picture session.

And then Joseph jumps on me and shouts: "Selfies!" And here they are.

Snippets: April Recap

1. Until last week, I had no April folder for pictures because I just hadn't taken any pictures this month. What's the point of having a nice camera if you don't use it? Dan's thinking this as he reads it. 

2. I turned 30! Wow, crazy, unimaginable! Once upon a time, I thought that 30 was grown up and people who were 30 must have their lives all in order and everything figured out. Hmmm. By all appearances, maybe I/we are grown up: homeowners, parents to three, responsibilities and bills to pay. But seriously?! I don't feel that old. Like, as old as I once thought 30 was. 

2. I was 30 weeks pregnant the week I turned 30. And now I'm a whopping 33 weeks! The countdown is on, sort of. Feeling huge and knowing I'll be getting even bigger. I've been trying to stay off my feet a little bit to stave off a hip instability that's a pain, literally. This means trying not to be on my feet all day long. Varied success. I'm not a natural couch potato.

 

3. Dan is finishing up his last week of crazy-busy after school activities this week. With his catechism kids receiving their sacraments this weekend, we'll be in the clear for seeing Daddy a little bit earlier in the day and on weekends. Yay! Joseph and John Paul alternately say at various points throughout the day (or even seconds after Dan has left after lunch) "I miss Daddy!" or "I'm miss Daddy!" (John Paul's words). But, the countdown is on until the end of the school year and Dan still has lots to do before baby arrives sometime in June. 

4. We got to hang out with all the Millette side cousins last weekend for Grandma Millette's birthday. Joseph has decided that "Cousins are friends and friends are cousins." Also, that he wants to visit with all his cousins way more than we actually do. 

The "big" kids gathered swords, water guns, and sling shots to "hunt the wolf" (otherwise known as friendly Emma, the dog). This, after the boys tried capturing and attacking the girls. They were easily convinced that the girls needed protecting and could be allies. Emma was thrilled with all the attention. 

Meanwhile, the "little" kids sort of joined in on the fun and smiled awkwardly. Actually, John Paul loves, loves, loves all the attention he gets from his big girl cousins. He cried when he had to go home and leave Marie (10) and Claire (8) behind. We sure could use a big sister over here for a few months, just sayin'.

5. We've been having some great weather of late. In years past, we've been known to still have snow at this time of the month. But it's been gone for a while now and winter clothes packed away. We've had shorts out on a few occasions, but mostly still long-sleeves or a bunny-hug. We'll take a bit of global warming in this province. 

Joseph's new favourite activity is to use the old stroller as some kind of self-motorized vehicle and roll himself around. 

And John Paul runs and runs. I can't get him to hold still for a photo, never mind look at the camera and offer one of his beautiful smiles.

6. Joseph quotes:

Joseph: "Have you ever had a 5-year-old or a 10-year-old before, Mum?
Me: "Um, no..."
Joseph: "Well, you're going to have those kind of old year-olds soon!"

7. John Paul quotes:

John Paul: "Mommy, you not Dod... Daddy, you not Dod"
Me: "Who is God?"
John Paul: "Dod!"

Every time we're ready to pull out the driveway in the van: "Read roll, Mum? Ready rock, roll?"

St. Joseph's Day, LOL

It's St. Joseph's Feast Day. Let's take a break from lent and all our fasting, hairshirts, and self-whippings to have a laugh or two. Here are some random things I've come across recently...

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Awww. Such a man crush going on.

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From a biography on St. Andre Bessette:

Pilgrim at a busy St. Joseph's Oratory: "Boy, St. Joseph must be busy these days!"
St. Andre: "Yes, he doesn't even have time to shave!"

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John Paul (who is learning to talk) was running around the house, holding his Spot book, and yelling that he wanted to "read Spot": "WEEEED!    POT!...     WEED!    POT!...     WEED!     POT!!..  
NOW!!!"

I should teach him how to say: "Duuude."

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As for how he says other words, his "yes" is something to behold. Drop the "y" sound, Make the "e" sound more like an "a". We asked him if he had a big bum. He responded with an emphatic: "A$$!"

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John Paul often thinks he has a beard. If you ask him to show you his beard, this is the face he makes:

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Continuing with John Paul, our little guy is obsessed with Judas. Yes that's right, Judas. We have some tub toys of Jesus with the 12 apostles (and a boat). John Paul makes a high pitched evil sounding: "Eaaaaihhh!!!" when he picks up Judas. Now don't worry, John Paul knows that Jesus is good, and Judas is bad. Judas is "the bad one." He sells Jesus for "the money."

The other day John Paul wasn't listening to Becca. He refused to obey her, and was crying and being angry. He doesn't like not getting his way. In a fit of tearful spite he proclaimed to Becca: "I'm Judas!"

Whoa.

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From our local town coffee shop paper, The Buzz:

"During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password: MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy

When asked why such a big password, she said that it had to be at least 8 characters long.

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Joseph has been very excited for St. Joseph's Day. He says: "St. Joseph SMASHES lent! Yeah. He smashes lent on his day and we can eat dessert."

Here Joseph is giving us a goofy face:

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Our boys love to fight. It starts with John Paul who spend 10-30 seconds trying to tuck a little blanket under his neck (I have no idea why).

As soon as he does he races after Joseph and tries to tackle him. Joseph's job is to try and withstand the furious assault. As soon as one, or both, come crashing to the ground then John Paul picks up his blanket, tries to arrange it under his neck (?), and then the fight starts again. It goes on until one, or both, get hurt. So much fun.

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 I can't wait to try this. We could make a Becca character.

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Hmm

I'll stop now. I have to go enjoy myself today before I'm back to the ole hairshirt for Holy Week. Happy St. Joseph's Day.

Our Week: Water & Whine

It's been a very hot week around here. I filled up the pool outside, let the water warm in the sun, and the boys played in it for three days. This morning it was a little slimy, but they jumped in anyway and then we dumped it after lunch.

Joseph pulled out some water-wings that made it into our house with some rummage sale box and has been enjoying wearing them (in the 6 inches of water in our tiny pool). Normally, the lifeguard in me would never allow my kids to wear water-wings, but in this case they've done no harm other than obstruct Joseph's ability to eat food easily -- which is actually kind of funny to watch. He insists on wearing his goggles on walks around the neighborhood or with his bike helmet while he's riding in the stroller, so actually wearing them in the pool was a pretty incredible idea -- except that he's too nervous to put them to use under the water. I'm getting desperate for Dan's holidays to begin so I can give him some real swimming lessons.

Incredibly, there are no mosquitoes to speak of -- only, there must have been one because John Paul has a massive red bump on his elbow -- so we have been picnicking in the backyard almost every day for lunch. We do, however, have a lot of ants running around so we have to watch out for them getting into our food (or maybe the boys are dropping food all over for the ants?).

Conversation snippet from lunch...

Joseph: "Get away, bee!"

Me: "That's an ant! Remember?"

Joseph: "Get away, bee!"

Apparently not.

At 15 months now, John Paul is a little boy. I'm almost nostalgic when I look at him and marvel at how he's grown and doesn't really look or sound like a baby anymore. I say almost because he still sleeps with me and wakes up more to nurse during the night than he nurses during the day (oh, this parenting trap I've fallen into).

In addition to cutting his first molar this week, he has also fallen flat on his face multiple times (check out the slight bruise in a picture below). He spends a bunch of his waking hours screaming at his brother because Joseph did something to him or screaming at me because Joseph won't let him do something. I am trying, without any apparent success, to teach him that we just don't accept screaming in our house.  

 

Joseph, meanwhile, is apparently a man.

Conversation snippets...

Checking out his arms: "Look, I'm growing MAN-hair."

Showing off his swim shirt: "Look at my muscle shirt... and my muscles."

Stripping down his shorts on the front lawn: "I have to go pee. I don't need any help, I can pee standing up now."

Stripping off all his clothes in the backyard: "Look, I'm going to be naked like John Paul" (who ran away in a diaper while I was putting on his bathing suit). 

We've all been waking up far too bright and early the last few days. We blame the morning light. Despite so-called blackout curtains, our room remains pretty bright in the morning. Dan has been waking at 4:30, me at 5:45, and Joseph at 6:00, while John Paul is the smartest one and sleeps until 7:00. Needless to say, we're all tired by lunch and ready for naps (which only some take).

We just smile and laugh at mealtimes as our kids fall apart and into tears over anything and everything. Joseph cried because he wanted lunch and we told him it was supper; John Paul fell apart because he wanted cucumber instead of ground beef and because I tried to feed him when he wanted to feed himself (even though he handed me the bowl and spoon). Parenting is the best!

And speaking of naps... I think I need to go take one before the nappers wake up.

Our Week, Brought to You in By the Letter S: Sick, Strong, Smash

A few weeks ago, when students at the school, staff, and friends of ours were getting sick I was... patting myself on the back that we hadn't really been sick much this winter. {Word from the wise: NEVER pat yourself on the back!}

Poor Joseph has been down for the count all week. Thankfully, he's been the only one, but it hasn't been much fun for him. Just when we thought he was better, he was sick to his stomach again. And then again. It's slightly weird to have him laying around much of the day and taking impromptu naps when he pleases. We'll be happy when he's feeling himself again.

Yet, despite throwing up all over himself and his bed one night, and then all over me and the hallway the next, he has insisted all week that he doesn't get sick. "Do you feel sick? Does your belly hurt?" we ask. "I never get sick!" he has emphatically stated. All week long. Dan finally explained to him that a belly ache and puking meant he was sick. But even still, he's insistent that he just doesn't get sick. It's kind of comical.

Even while sick this week, Joseph is gearing up for the exciting events of the summer - smashing the bathroom! Dan has been counting down the days until school ends and asking Joseph what they're going to do after he's done. "Smash!" is always the reply. Our little renovators are excited to get to work (Daddy is a little less enthusiastic).

Dan was telling Joseph the other day that he would need to wear a mask to help in the bathroom. "Yeah, I could wear a tiger mask, maybe!"



John Paul, meanwhile, is busy, busy busy. He is constantly on the move and constantly hungry. He always wants books read to him and will not take no for an answer. He's also teething (but that seems to have laid off a little lately - to give Mommy a break!) and chatty, chatty all the time.

Just this week, we suddenly realized that John Paul understands English. I know that sounds ridiculous, but there comes an age when kids just start understanding what you say... and he's reached it! We can tell him to go get something or go do something specific and he knows what we're talking about, so long as it's simple and easy.

He is also able to express himself more and more each day. We taught him sign language for "more" and "please" so he has been able to tell us that (usually when we ask or tell him to) for some time now. But recently, he has begun signing and saying "mo, mo" or "mee" when he asks for things. Other words and sounds are beginning to take shape too, his own little sounds for hat, book, snack.

Goofy as ever (following in Joseph's young footsteps), John Paul goes around trying to make everyone laugh. He growls or makes funny noises and laughs at his own joke. Whenever he's in the bathroom, he pats the toilet cover and says, "Poop" (no one taught him this... he is just that smart. Haha). It's so exciting to watch this little boy grow into his own little person.

Snippets: Quotes, Hugs, and Such

1. Recently, a friend asked Joseph at Mass, "What's new?" In the midst his business playing with her son, he quickly responded, "J is for Joseph!" He's been slowly learning to write his own name and loves that he can make J's all by himself. Only problem: he still hasn't decided whether he's a lefty or righty and when he gets writing with his left hand he tends to do backwards letters and words.

2. Recent Joseph quotes:

After saying Grace before Meals in French at Grandpa and Grandma Millette's house:
"I can't say it with my mouth yet."

Joseph: "Let's have a family hug... with no John Paul."

Joseph, playing with the drawstring on his pants: "When there's no pee coming, you tie your pants..."

Daddy: "Joseph, you're knocking your food onto the floor!"
Joseph: "That's ok, John Paul can come eat it."                Who needs a dog?



3. Cooking from scratch is a LOT of work! Last week I made: chicken pot pie (x3), bread, potato soup, scones, taco meat, tortillas, spaghetti sauce (x3), sausages (x2), BBQ pulled-pork (x2), gnocci (x4), burger patties (x4) and numerous other single meals. We eat a lot! Now I know that it was just one of those high-intensity weeks (I bit off more than I could chew some days) and I'll be happy to have some of those freezer meals in the coming weeks, but sometimes I just wonder if it's all worth it. I mean, what am I going to do when I have more kids and my boys eat WAY more food?!

4. Joseph and John Paul have been doing a lot of hugging lately. This comes from my side of the family; Millettes don't hug (At least, the boys don't. Ever.). More often than not, John Paul is trying to push Joseph away from him because his big brother is a little too rough. So Joseph is thrilled that John Paul wants to and likes to hug him. "He likes me! John Paul likes me!"



5. John Paul has been free-standing for a few seconds at a time lately. Sometimes he doesn't even realize it. Others he stands there and grins his funny, toothy grin. He is also crawling around at very high speeds, walking along furniture at ever quickening paces, and opening cupboard doors and emptying their contents before I can do anything about it.

We took him down to the basement last week to try out our loud, wooden baby walker/play cart. He's been pushing around kitchen chairs for a while now, so we figured he'd be ready. For the first little bit, he pushed and crawled on his knees, but before long he was zooming around with arms outstretched and feet trying to keep up with the cart.



6. John Paul is also our biggest eater. We're trying to teach him sign language for "more" in the hopes that he'll stop constantly yelling at us for more food. It's sort of catching on. He eats with great gusto. I've never seen anyone so happy to eat food, except perhaps Bob from the movie What about Bob? Yep, John Paul is pretty much Bob down to the "yom, yoms" at every bite. And he's never full. Put food in front of him, or dare to eat nearby and he's all over it. Got to keep up that 23 lb. figure!

7. Lent began. We gave up some of the usuals: TV, treats/desserts, etc. The day after Ash Wednesday, Joseph asked for some kind of treat and was told "No, it's Lent." "It's still Lent???" he asked, incredulously. We went over it again: Lent is 40 days, we can have treats on Sundays, after Lent it will be Easter and we can have lots of treats! And, of course, all the theological reasoning for giving up stuff we like. The next day: same thing. Finally, Dan printed off a nice little pathway to Easter countdown for him and we told him we'd colour in one square each day so he would know when Lent was over. Today, I showed him the two squares that needed to be coloured, one for today and one we missed yesterday. Joseph decided, triumphantly, "I'm just going to colour them all in and then it will be Easter!"